Thursday, October 29, 2009

Superfluous but loved

I had a conversation with a friend about a week or so ago about superfluous people. You know, those who spit a million honorifics before getting to their actual given names. Those who add every single degree they ever received  (undergraduate, graduate, and honorary) at the end of their e-mail signatures. Those who tout authority over a subject that's doesn't even belong to them. They seek to be seen in the right light, even if it means darkening other peoples' reputations. 


For the past year and a half, I've worked under such a person.  While she is nice and friendly, she walks to her own drum beat and not in a good way. I've seen her "go rogue", skip protocol, and send e-mails to the entire staff about subjects that don't fall under her jurisdiction. She's deftly transferred many of her duties to me and volunteered me to work on projects without my prior knowledge. And worse of all, I've actually witnessed her (and heard from others) make me the scapegoat for things going awry. 


Naturally, all of these things, topped off by possible damage to my name, irritated me to no end. I  began to resent her. Whenever she asked me to do something, a bitter taste would form in my mouth.  


But one day, I remember walking back to my desk.  I was heated up about some incident involving her, and I was ranting internally. But through all that mental ruckus, I heard God say:


"I love her just as much as I love you."

That stopped me in tracks. Despite all of her (professional) flaws and her social faux pas, He loves her completely and eternally. Just as much as He loves old sinful, selfish, imperfect  me. After that moment, I tried harder to have more patience and grant her more grace. And though her treatment of me didn't change much, my perception of her did. 


Unfortunately, as I write this, she may be losing her position due to her work performance. And though the dismissal is warranted, I sincerely pray that she lands well. 



"This is real love—not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other"
-I John 4:10-11

Monday, October 26, 2009

Good Day

Yesterday was a good day. It's been a while since I've had a genuinely good day and because of that, I think God decided to paint my day with laughter. Deep stomach-pinching sweet laughs.


I woke up that morning to a text from a friend that made a smile burst onto my face. During church service, I spent time laughing with some more friends at intentional (and unintentional) funny moments. 


I spent the latter half of the day goofing around and giggling with some more friends. We were laughing at nothing in particular but the laughs were rich and meaty and left me feeling full. When I got home last night, my feet were a bit blistered, due to a poor choice of shoes. But the good outweighed the bad. Yesterday, a friend reminded me of something I forgot (which I often do): 


"Instead of looking at what I don't have, I'm grateful for what I do." 


Grateful for good days.