Dudes Don't

It's common knowledge that men and women are different. Men have greater physical strength. Women are better at relating emotionally. A man's body is a series of angles while a woman is a composite of curves.

But who knew that even the little everyday things both of us face flow differently?

My coworker Bernard broke it down to me:

Dining

"If I go out to eat, alone or with a guy friend, I sit at the bar," he said.

"What!?" I exclaimed. "You wouldn't sit at a table?"

He turned his head side to side in disapproval. "No, we gotta sit at the bar. Especially if I'm eating alone. If I'm by myself, at least I can talk to the bartender or look at the T.V. If a man sits alone at a table, he just looks sad."

Hmm. "Not even a booth though? If there were four of you...?"

He sucked his teeth as he pondered.

Finally, he said, "Maybe."

Movies

"When I go to the movies with one of my boys, we don't sit next to each other."

I laughed. "Why not?" Every movie I've gone to see, whether it was with a man or a woman, we sat side by side, occasionally brushing elbows as we shared the use of the cup holder/armrest.

"Men just don't. He has to be a seat or two over or up. The only guy I sit right next to is my brother."

Bernard shook out his arm as he finalized, "You need that space."

Beds

When I have guests over, I usually give them my bed while I sleep on my couch or an airbed.

But Bernard shook his head at that.

"Only my mother can sleep in my bed," he declared. "I had a friend of mine come over and I didn't see him brush his teeth once...he can't sleep in my bed."

I was intrigued. "Really? What if a friend of yours had major surgery and had to stay with you. Where would they sleep?"

A handful of seconds passed.

"My couch pulls out. They'll be fine."

I told him," Well, there have been times when I'm visiting a friend where we share a bed."

At that admission, Bernard responded with a blank stare.

"No...just no. Dudes don't do that."

Our differences are indeed amazing.