Choose joy

God, once again, shows me how much He rocks. 

One day last week, I was listening to a Fred Hammond song, "Thoughts of Love." The lyrics beautifully illustrate the unfathomable love of God. I let the words saturate me and felt quiet joy flow through me. Because Jesus loves me, I can be happy and satisfied and smile breezily.  

The same way each morning I choose which shoes to wear or which earrings to slip through my earlobes, I can choose my perspective. Slip my arms through it, wrap it around my legs, fasten it around my waist.  My attitude is not determined by the day's events. I select it and wrap myself in it. I determine whether or not it will remain unchanged. And I decided that I can and will choose joy. 

But it's funny how revelations are so easily forgotten. Last Friday, an unexpected conversation twisted my whole evening. Afterwards, I could literally think of nothing else. I was worried, mentally calculating solutions, trying on results and frowning at the possibilities. The frustration of not knowing what to do and being fearful of all the results made me teary and angry. I fell asleep with the tears spilling onto my pillow.  But the conversation followed me there. I had dreams about it and I woke up exhausted and tight. 

At the start of this new week,  Jesus cleared my head via a Sunday morning sermon. I can be "careless in the care of God and know that my Father is taking care of it. And because He is and He loves me, I will choose joy. 

Thank You Lord (for the millionth time :)

"If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think He'll attend to you, take pride in you, do His best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way He works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how He works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes."

-Matthew 6:25-34 (The Message)

Sips

It was touch and go there for a second. For a huge chunk of last month, I was draped with heavy feelings. Actually, they were more than feelings. They were like blankets because I felt like I was bundled in them. I felt overwhelmed financially, worried about credit cards and student loans. I felt aimless, not knowing where God wants me to go or what He wants me to do. Should I stay in my current job? Should I leave to pursue something closer to my heart? If so, where and how?  Then the heaviest garment, loneliness, swaddled me from head to toe. I could actually feel it wrap around me at the oddest times: at work, at home watching CNN, even riding in the car with friends.


I remember one night praying and weeping to God. I truly had never felt such a thing. Tears were my daily diet and my nights were frequently restless. But while talking with the Lord, a thought occurred to me, "Take it in sips, not gulps." Sips. When you sip something, it's often because it's hot. It's too much to handle in bigger sections. If you were to gulp it down, you would either burn your tongue, scald your throat or worse, choke. But by sipping, the drink is easier to digest, you can enjoy the taste and best of all, it lasts longer. 


I think I was trying to down it all in one gulp. Discover my true passion, organize my life, and fall in love in one week! LOL. But Jesus reminded me that each day is a sip of my life that I should savor. He can handle the gulps. 


"So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today."
-Matthew 6:34 (NLT)